


This is Our Refuge

by Iziink



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anxiety, Depression, Developing Friendships, F/M, Night Terrors, POV Alternating, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, backstories, heart events
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-27
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2018-12-06 15:32:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11603541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iziink/pseuds/Iziink
Summary: Of all the places she's been, Stardew Valley seems the most surreal. Her life hasn't been easy and sharing her history is something Nyla struggles tremendously with. She hopes she can finally find peace and friendship in the Valley. She doesn't expect to find the understanding that she seems to discover. But fears of rejection can cloud more than just her judgement.





	1. These Slow Days

**Author's Note:**

> Well, hello there! This is my first fanfic on here though I've written a bit in the past. I'm sure this will start off slow similar to most stories but this is just a fun project I decided to start since I've fallen in love with this game and its characters. I'll update tags, ratings and what not as the story progresses as I'm not totally sure where this is headed. Enjoy. :)

# 

##### Nyla

###### 

It could always be worse, she told herself. Though her steps were timid, the floorboards creaked under her weight. Everything here seemed so old and forgotten, a place that had been lost by time. She mildly wondered if having had that envelope stuffed in her drawer had anything to do with it. As if the dark, monotonous life of Joja Inc. had somehow seeped through the deed and to the farm. She scoffed at such an idea. It was ridiculous...but so was the overgrowth that dominated the landscape. "At least I have a starting point," she murmured, swinging open the farmhouse door, surprised to find the place remembered. 

"Oh!" The older gentleman startled at the door, " You're earlier than I expected! Forgive me, I was just tidying up." He picked his cap up from the table and placed it on his head. "Well, now, I'm Lewis, the old Mayor of Pelican Town. It's Nyla, correct? How wonderful to meet you." Lewis smiled and shook her hand. 

"It's nice to meet you as well. Oh...and thank you. I didn't expect anyone to be here nonetheless cleaning for me." It genuinely surprised her to find such a warm welcome. It soothed many of the doubts she had fretted over during the bus ride here. She wouldn't be completely alone, the farmhouse was not dilapidated (though needing a kitchen replaced this), and the mess of it all made her feel wanted. Past her thoughts, she remembered the old man's name.

"You knew my grandfather, didn't you?" Lewis nodded solemnly, motioning to a vase of beautiful tulips. 

"I did and I'm sorry he's gone. I brought these as both a small gift and a tribute. Something to brighten up this house. Now, I'll let you get settled but before I forget," he drew a paper from his pocket, "I thought it'd be nice..sort of like a fun egg hunt," he laughed slightly, "it's a list of everyone in town. Just check 'em off as you meet 'em. I've taken care of mine there," he handed her the paper and gave her a light pat on the shoulder. "Please, if you need anything let me know. Town's just down the road. Relax today, explore tomorrow." 

Nyla fell into the chair when he left. He was right, she needed to relax, but her mind ticked away with thoughts of the coming weeks.

##### Shane

###### 

 **"...NOW STAY TUNED FOR TOMORROW'S FORECAST! YOU MIGHT NEED TO-"** The radio slid from the bedside table and clattered to the floor. The announcer's voice made his head throb. _'Or you just drank too much again, idiot,'_ He didn't dare open the curtains yet, afraid of the blinding rays of light that would get through. No matter when he woke, especially on weekdays, it was always too damn early. Shane rolled out of his bed and stretched. A few cans clattered around as he threw on his usual attire, which had been aimlessly tossed the night before. Dull routine dominated his life and today was no different.

Aunt Marnie was in the kitchen, arranging a basket of eggs and wild flowers. The thought of who they were for left his mind as soon as it appeared. Hands in his pockets, Shane kept his head down and quickly headed to the door. 

"Shane, I won't keep you dear but if you see her, just be nice and say hello," Marnie was still fidgeting with her basket, her words to her nephew merely an afterthought. 

"Sure." He didn't know nor did he care who his aunt was talking about. Most likely the birthday or anniversary of someone that didn't care if he said hello or not. Shane headed through town, his headache growing with every step. At least it would be numbed by the countless amount of product that needed a shelf. However, the numbness he craved wouldn't come until later. He sighed and then looked up; his trail of thought had been broken by the loud bell that jangled from Pierre's door.

The woman that exited the store was unfamiliar to him. Her long, black hair was extremely straight, the bangs of which covered her eyebrows slightly. Green eyes stood out strikingly well against her red-brown skin. It resembled terracotta pots Gunther used to have at the museum. She wore overalls and a long-sleeved shirt. Dirt covered her boots. None of that really mattered to him though and he began to move on.

"Oh, hello!" She seemed to cross the distance between them inhumanly fast. Why would she want to meet him? He sure as hell didn't want to meet her. His eyes narrowed and pace quickened.

"I don't know you. Why are you talking to me?"

"Well, I need to know you." 

Shane stopped and looked at her. Need? How could she need anything from him? He must have been giving her an awfully scrutinizing look, for she presented him a paper. 

"Sorry, Mayor Lewis wanted me to meet people and learn their names. I'm Nyla, I just - hey!" He didn't have time to listen to her prattle on about the Mayor. If Lewis needed something he could talk to him after work and not send his secretary after him. Shane turned from her mid sentence. Thankfully, she didn't call after him aside from the initial interruption. Hopefully that would be the only dissonance that would find its way into his day.

##### Nyla

###### 

The saloon greeted her with happy conversations. A few glasses clinked and the fire filled the room with warmth and an earthy scent. A scene like this made her feel a deep rooted nostalgia she forgot she had. It, however, saddened her. Her feelings quickly passed from her mind as Emily, the blue-haired barmaid, greeted her. 

"I was hoping you'd show up tonight! Gus, give her one on the house to celebrate her first, official night here," she then leaned a bit towards Nyla and lowered her voice, "yesterday doesn't count because you spent it at home. Just don't say anything." Emily laughed a bit and placed a beer in front of her. Honestly it wasn't something she would usually drink. She enjoyed wine, particularly of the mulled variety. Turning down a gift would be rude, though, so she graciously accepted.

"Everyone here's been so welcoming. It's hard to believe it's real." Nyla ran her fingers over the condensation on her glass. Though not all to her taste, everyone here at least seemed to have a story to tell. She particularly liked Emily, having met her earlier in the day. The waitress had a hobby of making her own clothes. This was something that had excited Nyla. Clothes making wasn't a talent of hers but embroidery was. She hoped this was something they could possibly have a friendship over but had not brought it up in their previous conversation. Now, perhaps, was a better time. A door slamming shut interrupted her.

The man she had met, or more correctly, greeted in the earlier hours of the morning had just walked in. She hadn't seen anyone else in the village that looked so worn. Nyla thought he looked rather bitter. Not just towards the people in the saloon but towards just existing. His eyes and the bags around them were dark. She assumed he may not be as old as his appearance could have implied. Things other than time can age people. He didn't look at anyone as he made his way towards the corner of the fireplace. A tall glass had snuck its way to the counter next to him without her noticing. This must be a regular occurrence. 

Nyla hadn't meant to stay staring at him. He didn't really draw her attention in anyway but she wondered why everyone but him seemed more or less content to be here. So why wasn't he? And would she be too? Emily noticed her watching him before he did.

"Did he say something to you? Shane can be a jerk most of the time but after a few drinks he'll usually say hello if you approach him slowly and don't make any sudden movements." While Emily spoke Nyla unfolded the nearly complete list from her pocket. 

"Sort of...I never got his name this morning but you've just given me it. He'll be glad I won't have to bother him again." She checked off the last name. Living in such a small town would make it hard for her to live up to her words. Nyla was not one to push someone into conversing with her and besides, there were many more people in town that _wanted_ to talk to her. But as she sat there, finishing the beer she was sure would live a bad taste in her mouth, Nyla couldn't help but glance at Shane. His eyes never wavered from his glass. Nor the second. Nor the third. He would shut them for minutes at a time, going someplace she felt might be frightening. The opening of them would be followed by a long swallow to chase that place away.

She rose from her seat and waved at Emily. "I think I'll come around here some time if I'm not too busy. There's a few things I'd still like to share but it's rather late." A large smile grew on Emily's face. Nyla felt a boost in herself from the other woman's happiness. Emily was quite full of spirit.

"Yeah! I'd love someone to chat with, especially when it's slow. I'll see you later then, Nyla!" A few of the other patrons bid her farewell as she left. She stole one more glance at Shane and found his eyes shut.


	2. Up to my Toes in 'Tatoes

##### Shane

###### 

**"...♩♫♩♪ THANK YOU FOR JOINING US! TODAY WE'LL SEE IF THE SPIRIT'S-"** His pillow landed atop the radio, muffling the sound. The spirits could kiss his ass for all he cared. Out of every radio program to jostle him awake, the fortune teller was the worse. Yoba meant nothing to him and the ideas of fates and fortunes were just as deluded. Shane pulled himself to a sitting position, his eyes blinking in the dimness. A crack emitted from his shoulder as he stretched his arms out. Lately, it seemed, he always woke up sore. Shane rubbed his palms deep into his eyes as he stood, drawing in a long breath. Throwing on his ratty hoodie he headed into the kitchen. Upon seeing who was at Marnie's counter, however, he immediately retreated to his room. Why was _she_ here?

Shane had found out the woman he met was a new farmer. Some relative of the old owner of the worn down farm north of his aunt's house. Marnie hadn't been too pleased when she heard how he blew her off. Really, though, why did it matter if he knew her? In the week following their first encounter, she hadn't approached him aside from a few greetings here and there which he deliberately failed to respond to. Soon she would fall in the same pattern of giving him concerned stares or judgemental headshakes. It would be easier to skip the phony pleasantries. Still, he knew there would be times like these where she was unavoidable. He looked at his watch.

7:55

The threat of being late slowly crept behind him. He could spare some time, hiding in his room like a child or he could walk through the kitchen and out the door, ignoring the woman he couldn't care less about. Surely his Aunt would berate him and for now, that was enough to keep him in his bedroom, door cracked, listening to see when she'd leave. 

"I'm so glad you enjoyed the eggs. Fresh from our own hens of course." Marnie always took pride in the items her animals produced. A pride she seemed to lack when she spoke of other things.

"I um..." The farmer paused, her voice small compared to Marnie's. "My crops aren't quite ready yet so I made this...to thank you." 

"Nyla, what a surprise! How sweet of you! I'll hang it right up here so everyone will see it."

"I'm glad you like it! Thanks for the heater, Marnie. I'll definitely be back once I get that barn built. It'll be nice to have some livestock to care for." 

They said their goodbyes and only after hearing the door shut did Shane trudge from his bedroom. Marnie seemed to agitate at the timing. _Here we go._

"You were waiting for her to leave, weren't you?"

"So what if I was?"

Marnie let out a disappointed sigh. Why did it bother her so damn much? He hardly talked to anyone else yet he hadn't heard her mention that in months. _Months._ Shane had only been here eight months but he couldn't recall the last time Marnie mentioned his lack of socializing. He must be wearing on her. 

"I guess I was just hoping...I know it's hard for you to talk to people, especially the ones here for some reason, maybe someone new could help with that. She doesn't talk much about herself so she's rather easy going-"

Shane let out a snort. Someone new could help with that? What a ludicrous notion. Marnie folded her arms angrily.

"You do not have to be rude. I'm only looking out for you because I care, Shane. I won't push you, just be nice to her." Marnie eyed him like a child. Arguments had been occurring more often between them. It wasn't that he didn't care about Marnie. On the contrary, her and Jas were probably the only things he cared about. His eyes wandered to the living room where the door to Jas' room sat. A knot formed in his stomach, the breath in his lungs unable to leave. Everywhere he was reminded of his failures to her.

His watch began to beep.

8:20. Shit.

Shane rushed to leave. "Have a good day dear." Marnie called after him. He turned to appease her with a small wave and noticed she had placed onto the counter what he was assuming was the gift from the farmgirl. 

It was a circle of cloth on a wooden ring. Silk perhaps, he didn't know but it seemed shiny like silk. On it was a simple picture she had sewn into it. Eggs and a fluffy hen resting above them happily. That was what Marnie wanted to hang up? A toddler could make something so basic. Shane left, hastily moving through town. Morris would kill him if he was late or worse, dock his pay. Every few steps his mind couldn't help but wander back to that stupid picture. Ugh. Why did that chicken have to be so damn cute?

##### Nyla

###### 

Ugh. Why did farming have to be so hard?

Nyla was lying on the ground, the cool, wet soil slowly soaking into her back. Nothing was growing. She was going to go broke and starve. Turning her cheek into the earth, she looked at her home. _Her home._ It still didn't feel right...being here. The house continued to feel foreign. Floorboards creaked when she didn't expect them to. The nights were colder here than they were in the city. Quieter. She turned to face the sky again, squinting in the sunlight. This wasn't going to work out, was it? Farming may not be her forte but running...

A cat rammed its forehead into her cheek.

"Prunello..." She turned her face, only to have him push into her harder. "Persistent, eh." She ran her hand down the grey cats back, his bum lifting into the air with his tail. He had shown up a few days after she moved in, sauntering his way to her porch and plopping down. He had looked up at her then, mewing a single time and that's all she needed. He was staying.

Nyla hadn't lived with an animal in years, despite her extensive love of them. She understood them and they adored her. The pieces of her life just never fell into the right places again. The prospects of owning cows, chickens, and even goats one day thrilled her. It seemed to motivate her enough to stand up and brush what soil she could from her back and hair. "I'm sure Pierre will have something to help. He grows some stuff too, ya know. Stay here, stay safe." A pat on his head and she was gone.

A warm greeting met her as always. "Ah, Nyla, what brings you in today?" Pierre was rubbing a cloth around his counter; a bottle of spray sat to the side.

"I was actually wondering if you had any advice for a first time farmer?" She gave him a small smile, hoping he hadn't seen the flecks of dirt she'd left behind her. 

"Well," a glint flashed across his glasses, "firstly make sure you water your crops every day. And second," he pulled a large bag from behind the counter and heaved it on top, "if you're having trouble using that old soil my high quality fertilizer should do the trick." 

Nyla looked at the bag thinking of the little hungry seeds planted on her farm. More air than coin filled her wallet so this was going to hurt. Fortunately hunger didn't kill her nearly as quickly as her plants. The exchange was made and she left the store, stopping outside it to count the dismal amount of coin she had left. While in front of Pierre's, she noticed something she hadn't before: a calendar hanging on the public notice board in front of the shop. Aside from the holidays, name's were dotted around on particular dates.

_Birthdays on display,_ she thought. It revealed a lot about this place, like how important the sense of community was here. Everyone cared about everyone else. Would her name appear on here without her doing? Was gifting an obligation? Would she receive a present? As if she had an important role here, necessary in the longevity of the village. That sort of acceptance had to come with a price, didn't it? Nyla's throat suddenly felt dry. Swallowing hard, she gripped the bag of fertilizer tightly and quickly left the notice board behind her.

She got to the saloon much later than intended, dirty, tired, and hungry. Nyla folded her arms across the bar, resting her head on them. Emily was refilling Shane's drink when she saw Nyla sit down. 

"Coming in late tonight, huh?" She set the pitcher down near Shane, who Nyla was sure would finish before the night's end. "You look rough."

She looked up at her with her eyes, "Thanks."

Emily gave her a soft smile. She pulled up a stool she kept behind the counter and matched Nyla's position. "Wanna talk 'bout it?"

"You're busy."

"Everyone has a full glass."

Nyla lifted her head, the stare from Emily too overpowering. Why couldn't she just tell her it was about her potato seeds? Or that she'd have to live off the mystery cans in her house. Or the idea of everyone knowing her birthday gave her anxiety? A loud grumble broke the silence. Her stomach had betrayed her.

Emily hopped up at the sound, clapping her hands together. "So, that's it! Let's get you a plate of...hey, I don't know what you like to eat since you never do here. Whaddya want?" 

Nyla looked at the counter, heat rising to her face. Any words refused to leave her mouth. The saloon felt packed with people and she had no room to move. She couldn't keep taking from such generous people.

"Nyla?"

Cheeks red, she looked back to the barmaid, "I don't have any money, Emily. I'm sorry, please don't-"

"Don't say another word." And Emily ran off to the back, leaving Nyla sitting there. It felt like everyone was watching her. This would be the perfect time to get up and leave. Just head back to the farm and open one of the worser cans for dinner as punishment for getting herself into such a situation. Her leg started to bounce, the urge to run almost too much. Then Shane let out a small laugh.

"What?" She was shocked to see him looking at her. So this was his brand of humor? A fair bit of pink covered his cheeks as well. It may have been a sign he had more than usual tonight.

"You come here and within a week, you're broke. But you're giving out gifts. Just seems a bit ass backwards to me," he took a long drink, finishing his current glass.

_He's drunk, don't listen to him,_ she told herself. Nyla couldn't find an argument for anything he had said. She had been ill prepared for her move to Stardew Valley. Jumping from place to place was common for her, staying was a luxury. But Zuzu City kept her for nearly a year. The rut she had gotten herself stuck in in that horrible place had taken something from her. At some point the hollowing feeling she had became too much, so she left with too little money and an old dream.

"You're right," and he looked at her seemingly puzzled as if not expecting her to agree with him. "I wasn't ready but I..." She was tapping the table now, unease snaking through her body. Her words were flowing from her mouth easily. He'd probably forget everything she said. "I had stopped running for too long. I wasn't strong enough to stay. I only saw two options. It was moving here or..." Nyla stopped and they merely looked at each other. It dawned on her that he was actually listening to her. Her cheeks began to burn again and her attention turned towards the door Emily had disappeared behind. Relief washed over her when it swung open.

Emily reappeared carrying a piping hot plate of steamed vegetables and thick slices of roast chicken. Smells that were absolutely divine filled her nostrils. A creamy mushroom sauce covered the entire dish. A tiny droplet dripped to the counter when Emily placed it in front of Nyla. "Emily I ca-"

"Yes, and you're going to. Gus told me he heard you were buying lots of fertilizer today too. Crop trouble can be rough in the beginning. We'll take care of your dinners until your first harvest, okay?" Emily left no room for argument and sat with Nyla until she began eating. 

She wanted to cry, it was so delicious. Nyla scarfed down the vegetables quickly but took her time with the chicken, savoring every bite. While she was completely lost in her dinner, she hardly noticed Shane get up and leave, his payment for the night resting next to his glass. Emily waved him off for the night, noting it was earlier than usual, and went to clean the mess.

A fresh, empty glass clinked as Emily set it down next to Nyla's plate. "Oh, Em, I'm fine. I couldn't take anymore from you guys." _Em?_ Where had that come from? Emily made no notice of her pet name.

"Looks like Shane didn't finish what he ordered. Weird, never does that, but there's no reason to let it go to waste," Emily poured what was remaining from the pitcher into the new glass. It reached almost to the top, the foam tickling the edges. Nyla watched as the bubbles floated to the top, only to pop when they reached the surface. Was this a deliberate act of kindness? One of self-preservation? Regardless, she smiled. At least for tonight, she'd be happy.


	3. Eggs with Emily

##### Emily

###### 

Emily couldn't count the number of egg filled bowls that littered her house. She had volunteered to help paint eggs for the Egg Festival tomorrow and, in her excitement, made far too many. It would be a daunting task applying every egg with vibrant patterns and colors. She wasn't worried, though. Emily had someone to help. 

Nyla had come into the saloon the night before, her green eyes bright and smiling. "My plants are doing really well! Not much longer, now." And Emily had seen something she hadn't before; a spark of the farmer's aura. 

It was something that had been bothering her since they first met. Normally they were shimmering colors. Beautiful energies surrounding the people she met, detailing some of their more prominent traits. But Nyla's had been muddy. A swirling dark fog that told her she had a sadness to her. Something had to have happened to hide the fiery orange-yellow that shined so briefly the night before. Emily was interested in that something.

"Wanna color eggs with me? It's for the Egg Festival tomorrow." She had asked, and it seemed to her that Nyla took an awfully long time to respond, her gaze at the counter the entire time. The color from her aura was already gone.

"Okay but...I've never...done that. Or a festival...for eggs I mean." The poor girl seemed to get so embarrassed at the silliest things. It did strike Emily as odd she'd miss out on all that but what mattered was that they'd get to do those things now, together.

"Don't worry, it'll be fun. We can use paints or dyes so we'll have lots of options. Then we get to hide them tomorrow! It's usually just the kids-"

"Dyes?" That peaked Nyla's interest. She agreed to the invite and Emily celebrated by purchasing too many eggs.

Emily was placing what felt like the hundredth bowl on a couch cushion when there was a knock on the door. "It's open!"

The door opened and in walked her expected guest. "Hi, oh wow." Nyla's eyes scanned the room, her lips slightly parted. "We're not using all this, it's expensive," she stated not in reference to the eggs, but the tiny leather pouches she had brought along. Emily grinned widely.

"I can't wait to see those. I've got some store kits too so we've got plenty of color!" She scurried around the room grabbing all the finishing touches. Small cups dotted the table, napkins resting next to them. They were filled three-fourths of the way with water. Trays with tiny connected cups were filled with colorful paints. Most importantly she had a bowl of eggs sitting next to some old, empty egg cartons. The perfect drying racks. She threw two pillows on the floor and quickly sat on one. "Can we start with one of those pigments you brought?"

Nyla joined Emily on the floor, the tips of her long black hair gently brushing the ground when she sat down. She placed one of her pouches on the table, undoing the drawstring that kept it shut. A deep blue powder rested inside. Emily stared at its intensity, taken aback by its richness.

"It's beautiful. Where did you get that?"

A small grin crossed Nyla's face. "It's a secret." She tipped the pouch ever so slightly, tapping on the bottom with a single finger. Grains of blue slowly fell from the pouch into the water, turning it from sky to royal blue. When she was happy with the shade, Nyla grabbed a spoon and stirred the mixture. "Should be fine. We don't have to heat it up or anything?" She asked, tapping the spoon on the side on the cup.

"Nope! We just dip and wait. I'll make some more if you want to put an egg in. What do you use these for?" Emily began to rip open other packets of dye she bought at the store. Soon the other cups were filled with a rainbow of colors.

After dropping the egg in her blue filled cup, Nyla stared at the color swirling around it, "Oh, for my embroidery floss. I can get a little picky with the colors sometimes, so I'll dye my own cotton. It's hard to get the materials though, so I don't use it often anymore." Emily wondered if that was a skill she could ever learn. Clothes making was one of her passions so making cute little pictures out of thread couldn't be that hard, right?

Silence soon fell between the girls as they added painted designs to other eggs as they waited for the color to soak into the shells of the submerged ones. Emily had noticed the farmer fell into long silences with others. She'd sit smiling, listening as the others prattled on about their lives, never once diverting her attention from them. Hardly would she share. Emily herself knew three things about her: She loved her sole hobby of needle work, she was twenty-six years old, and she had come here from Zuzu City to live on her late grandad's farm. Though Nyla was nearly always happy her interactions with people reminded her a bit of when Shane first arrived here. 

He had tried as Nyla was, sitting and listening to others. He hadn't exuded any kind of friendliness or charisma, though, and soon those tries became fewer and fewer. Emily had watched as Shane retreated into himself. He now rarely only spoke to her or Gus. He had also come here with a dark, muddy aura and Emily had not yet witnessed a change of color from it. Emily wasn't ignorant to the problems the other villagers had but the scars these two seemed to wear ran deep. She wasn't assuming Nyla would suffer the same fate, though. On the contrary she seemed to be flourishing in the valley, at least to Emily. She just wanted to make sure Nyla stayed that way.

"So, is your family back in the city? My mom and dad are actually travelling the world right now and they left Haley and I to watch the house," Emily questioned as she stood, grabbing a finished carton to move out of the way. She turned her head to look at the back of Nyla's. The paintbrush in her hand was completely still. She couldn't see her expression but Emily felt her tension. 

"Yeah...no, well, north of the city I mean. Pretty far north. We don't speak. Where have your parents been?" Nyla seemed to dodge Emily's questions with ease, always bringing the conversation back to her or the activity. She gave her just enough information to make prying for more seem rude. Emily hoped her first question hadn't brought up something too nasty. 

The few hours they spent together seemed to go by quickly as carton after carton of drying eggs replaced the numerous bowls. Dazzling patterns and colors adorned the shells of each egg. The blue pigment Nyla had brought created the most vibrant blue she had ever seen. It was dark, but bold, and reminded her a bit of a not quite yet nighttime sky. Emily packed up a special carton for Nyla to take home. She hadn't visited the old farmhouse yet but had heard a little about it from Lewis.

"They're not crystals but I painted some of these with the right colors to give you and your house good energy. Stop by anytime, don't want you getting lonely up there." Nyla gave her a large smile.

"Thanks Emily...this was fun. I'll see you tomorrow at the festival, okay?" The girls parted ways, Emily waving Nyla off as she headed through town. She definitely would see her tomorrow.

##### Nyla

###### 

Nyla woke the next morning quite anxious about the day. She felt like making a good impression at her first festival was important. Her chores seemed to take no time at all. While she she threw on a suitable outfit (her only pair of nice jeans and grey button down) her mind ticked away with images of the coming holiday. After tying her long hair up and then braiding it, she was ready to depart. 

The town center had been transformed by lovely decorations and tables. Pierre had set up a sales booth right at the entrance, hoping to catch people on both their arrival and exit. Aromas of deliciously fresh food wafted towards her. The smells almost gave her goosebumps. Gus really went all out. Stray petals floated through the air, carried by the wind. Nyla took a moment to scan the scene, taking in everyone's activities. Most were in their usual groupings that she was beginning to familiarize herself with, chatting, laughing. A pit formed in her core and she almost ran back to her farmhouse but a loud call stopped her.

"Hey Nyla! Come on over!" Emily was waving her over. _Can't leave now,_ she thought. Taking a deep breath, she headed towards Emily. Jodi was standing with her. Nyla didn't know her too well aside from her family relations. Sam seemed decently nice and she couldn't deny she thought the guitar was pretty cool.

"Hi Emily, Jodi. How's it going?"

"Great! Look at all the food Gus and I made. Well...mainly Gus," Emily almost whispered the last part. She looked back to the food, famished. Unfortunately, courtesy demanded she stay, at least for a few more minutes. Swallowing, she turned back to the other women. 

"Well, thanks for all of it then. So, how have you been Jodi? Sorry I don't see you more often. I get stuck in my routines." The mother of two smiled warmly at her. It struck Nyla that she was an understanding person, someone that was kind. She liked that.

"Oh, don't worry. Running a household alone keeps me pretty busy too. With two boys it's a never ending mess!" The two locals laughed a bit, but the concern on Nyla's face caught Jodi's attention. "It's alright, I know I forgot to tell you. My husband's off fighting in the war right now but he'll be back soon. It's just so much more work without him." 

Nyla suddenly felt extremely faint. Sounds seem to fade into the distance as she clasped her hands together over her stomach, trying her best to remain steady. _What did you expect? You've always had rotten luck._ She closed her eyes, but it didn't help. It never helped. The town center seemed to melt away. She felt the remembrance of searing heat, acrid smoke, a smothering in her chest.

"Nyla!" It wasn't the first time Emily had tried to get her attention. The severity in her tone gave it away. She was back but she needed space now...and food.

"Sorry...I haven't ate today. I'm fine, just give me a bit." She didn't wait for an answer as she bee-lined for a buffet table. When she made it, she rested her palms on the table, staring down into the punch bowl. As wavy and red as it was, Nyla could still see her reflection a small bit. God, she looked tired. She hated how her heart was still racing, how she still felt uneasy. Her shaking leg caused the waves in the punch to worsen, her reflection breaking. Trying to clear her mind, Nyla grabbed a cup and dipped it into the punch. The cup was just at her lips when someone stopped her.

"Hey." It was Shane, sounding a little forceful. Nyla looked around a little, trying to decide if he was actually talking to her. Usually she didn't mind but right now did not want to deal with his attitude. 

"What?"

He glared at her slightly, seemingly put off by her response. She didn't care much. He hardly gave her anything nicer. How could he be related to someone as sweet as Marnie?

"Pam spiked the punch," was all he said as he returned to filling a plate with chips and some kind of salsa. Huh. He was just trying to be nice. She vaguely assumed someone might have said something to him about his behavior. Small towns talk a lot. Nice was still nice though, and that made her feel, well, nice.

"I'm sorry...thanks. Tell her to bring something a bit stronger next time though," and she took a long drink from her cup. Oh, it was spiked alright, but she still stood by her words. Nyla was craving warmed wine with oranges and cinnamon soaked in it. She noticed Shane was looking at her again, his eyebrows raised. She wondered if anything other than alcohol would catch his attention. Taking interest in what was on his plate, she grabbed a chip and dipped it in the bowl that matched the salsa, enjoying her first bite of food for the day. It was spicy and _wow_ , absolutely delicious. Nyla took another chip and another.

"Heh...it's alright," she only barely registered Shane was speaking to her again, a lighter tone this time, "You can't find hot pepper chutney like this in-" A spark went off in her brain, remembering the flavor. 

"In the city, right? I've looked, shit selection of any place that serves hot food. Actually, shit selection of everything." Honestly, she forgot how much she enjoyed it. Most of her nights had been met with a variety of easy and quick healthy food. Lots of raw veggies and lots of canned meat drowned in hot sauce. Nothing compared to the layers of flavor Gus had put together. How had she lived in that city? She realized her leg wasn't shaking anymore. 

Nyla was smiling at him, happy to finally be feeling relaxed. She didn't feel a pressing need to impress him like she did the others. Talking to him just seemed...easy. Not that she didn't enjoy Emily's company or anyone else's for that matter. Shane was just a different sort of company. Perhaps it was just the punch but she preferred to think not. 

"It's not hot enough though. Stuff I don't make rarely is." Shane scoffed at that a bit. He seemed more amused than annoyed for once.

"You don't look like you could handle something much hotter." His expression didn't seem to change as he spoke but there wasn't any snideness in his tone. Nyla shrugged, deciding to take it as a friendly jest. 

"We'll see about that. If I can ever get my hands on any good peppers I'll let you try one. _Maybe_ you'll be able to handle it." She grinned at him, wondering if he really could. What she spoke of wasn't like anything you could get here.

Mayor Lewis began yelling for people to gather around for the egg hunt. It wasn't something she wanted to participate in really, but she wanted to watch it. Afterall, she had never been to an Egg Festival. Grabbing a plate to go, she gave Shane a light wave. 

"I guess I'll talk to later, I told Emily I'd watch the hunt with her. See ya at the Saloon." And she made her way back towards Emily, hoping she wouldn't have too many questions about her departure. 

Watching the hunt had been quite fun. Emily had cheered for various people and they even helped the younger kids find some of the sneakier eggs. As the sun went down people slowly started to make their way home. Nyla, at Emily's behest, spent some time with her at her home again. But as the hours ticked on sleep started to cloud her mind. As she left Emily's, the town was eerily quiet at night. She was already used to at least one person being there. Wrapping her arms around herself, she decided to take the path that led past Marnie's ranch. She liked the cows, forest and the glittering fireflies that lined her way home.

As she walked, grass crunching under her feet, she saw a dark pillar rising in the sky. The light from the moon was just enough to illuminate it against the darkness of the night. _Smoke?_ She thought, suddenly worried about a fire. As she drew closer to the source, too curious to leave it undisturbed, she discovered it indeed was a fire. A fire coming from a large wagon. What was a wagon doing in Cindersap Forest? More importantly, who was its owner? She didn't think of herself as brave persay, but once she wanted to know something she had to know. A loud snort issued from the front of the structure as she approached, causing her to let out a little yelp.

A beautiful green haired woman poked her head from around the corner and when she saw Nyla, she smiled. "Ah, someone new! I've been here many times but I've never seen you. I'd remember you." Nyla thought that was a rather odd thing to say but pushed it aside, wanting to know more. 

"Who are you?" The woman came from around the wagon at her question. She was tall and wore exquisite blue silks that Nyla craved to touch. They seemed fearfully familiar. 

"Just a travelling merchant trying to make her way in the world. I'm setting up for tomorrow but for you being new, you can look now." She pulled a trunk from around the cart and popped open the lid. Nyla gazed inside, her mouth ajar. The woman, trying to guess her thoughts, continued, "Ah yes...they are expensive. But between us, I've smuggled some of this out of the Gotoro Empire." Nyla froze, the feeling from earlier returning. This time was different though.

"Let's talk for a bit."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, thanks for reading! This one seems to have gotten away from me with the length. If the length isn't alright though, let me know. :) I plan to keep them a bit shorter though, more like the first two. So just a little info, all chapters will be at least two character POVs, mostly Shane and Nyla. I'm not sure how many other character POVs there will be but I really enjoy Emily as a character. Perhaps Abigail as well because I am interested in making this an unrealistic/magic containing Stardew universe. We'll see~


	4. We're Just Friends in Low Places

##### Shane

###### 

The day started off the same as every other. Shane woke to his dark bedroom, the deep throbbing that seemed to greet him every morning was drilling away in his head. When he mustered the motivation to move to the kitchen, however, he found it wasn't just any other day. It had snuck up on him, the monotony of his life causing the days and months to blur together. Today was his birthday. His 30th birthday.

Marnie sat at the table, smiling, evidently waiting for him to get up. He hated when she did that but chose to not dwell on it, reminding himself that she was just trying to be nice. Shane's mood actually seemed to lift when he noticed what was on the table. His Aunt had baked him quite a delicious looking cake. Unfortunately, the large, frosted number drawn on it made him feel old. A few other birthday gifts (he was assuming) sat on the table. A mountain of fluffy scrambled eggs for breakfast, a card obviously drawn by Jas, and a small basket filled with dark colored peppers. "Good morning, dear. Happy Birthday. Just thought I'd fix you up a little something nice for the day." Marnie's expression was perfectly happy but her voice was laced with tension.

Shane pulled a chair from the table to sit. The first thing he did was pluck a pepper from the pile, examining it. Something like this hadn't come from the Valley, he was sure, and he had never seen one in Zuzu City. It was short, plump, and had a deep red color similar to wine. Not that he was a pepper connoisseur or anything, but he still had never had one. 

"Those are actually from Nyla," Marnie spoke up, "she dropped them off earlier saying she'd have a busy day but wanted you to have them now. She said to be careful." Shane rolled his eyes and dropped it back into the basket. As he ate through his breakfast he kept eyeing the basket. It impressed him enough she even knew about his birthday but why had she cared enough to drop off a gift for him? No one else had. Marnie made him swear he'd be kind at the Festival and he had been. He would admit she wasn't quite as boring as some of the others that resided here but he didn't think he had given her the impression he wanted to be friends. Mainly he hadn't wanted her to puke in the punch bowl. But she had genuinely talked and smiled at him, which hardly anyone outside his family did anymore. It made him feel pathetic that such a small gesture from a pretty girl made his mind reel. _Dammit._ Now he was calling her pretty.

"Thanks Marnie, I'm going to talk to Jas." Shane pushed his plate away, grabbing the card she made for him. He examined it as he made his way to her door. A messy drawing of a cake was on the front, the words 'Happy Birthday Shane!' were colored on a banner above it. When he opened it up, his heart began to ache. Jas had drawn a scene that spanned the full open length of the card. She stood in between her parents, holding their hands. Shane stood next to her father, his best friend. They all wore pointed birthday hats. He stared at the picture for a long time before lightly knocking on Jas' bedroom door. "Yeah?" A little girl's voice called from the opposite side.

She was sitting on the floor, playing with her dolls. When she saw it was Shane that came in she jumped to her feet, running up and throwing her arms around his waist. Jas looked up at him smiling, still hanging on to him. "Didya get my card? Do you like it? Oh, happy birthday too. Didya eat any cake yet? Aunt Marnie said I couldn't have any until you did." Her words left her mouth rapidly. Shane gently patted her back as he wriggled from her grasp.

"I did, see? It's really great Jas, thanks." She lit up at his words and Shane couldn't help but smile back. Most days the thought of Jas was the only thing keeping him moving. He constantly had to tell himself he had to be there for her. Day after day, though, it became harder to get by on those words alone. 

"Do you wanna play dolls with me?" Jas' light voice broke his train of thought. Honestly, playing dolls was the last thing he wanted to do. He wanted to spend the rest of his day trying to forget about the crayon drawing in his card. Her big brown eyes grew wide, surely worried he would turn her down as he had before. The saloon wasn't open until noon, however, so he didn't really have a good excuse to give her. He sighed.

"Alright. Let me go put this away." He heard Jas call about the cake as he went to put the card in his bedroom.

After getting distracted by Jas for what seemed like eternity, Shane went into the saloon a bit later than normal. He promptly ordered his usual beer and stood in his usual spot. The bitter liquid brought the relief he had been looking forward to. Hopefully, soon, the image of the happy little crayon family would blur from his mind. A sick feeling of guilt began to replace his grief. Jas hadn't meant anything by it, he knew that. She suffered such a greater loss than he had. She just wanted her parents to be a part of their life in anyway possible. Yet here he was, trying to bury their memory. 

"Happy Birthday, Shane! Here's one on the house." Emily smacked a glass onto the table, sloshing some over the side. Shane looked from her to the glass, a quizzical look in his eye. Out of everyone Emily had always been the kindest to him but again, nothing that should warrant gifts. "Nyla was here earlier, mentioned what day it was," she added. Now she was telling everyone? 

"Why does she even give a damn about me?" He snapped, sounding harsher than he intended. Emily pursed her lips. Great. Now he angered one of the few people he was forced to interact with. 

"Mainly because she's nice but I also think because she can't help it. Both your auras are like rainclouds." Emily stopped suddenly, as if she hadn't wanted to say that. Admittedly, he knew little about Emily but vaguely remembered overhearing conversations about crystals and energy from her. 

"So, because you think we're glowing the same color we'd be friends? That's a stupid idea." Shane finished his drink and grabbed the second one. Emily was now crossing her arms, glaring at him. 

"You don't have to be mean. I don't have time to explain it to you, but I would. In short I think you and her might be hurting but really, it's not my place to say. Enjoy your birthday, Shane." She stormed off, leaving him disgruntled and confused. He simmered, trying to finish his last beer as quickly as he could. After the conversation with Emily, the saloon's atmosphere felt too bleak, even for him. When his glass was empty, he opened the door and walked out into the cool night.

##### Nyla

###### 

"Alright, up!" The two women pulled the large board into place. "Just hold it there while I nail it." Nyla did as she was told as Robin grabbed her hammer. With a few strong whacks the board was steady enough to stand on its own. Robin wiped some sweat from her brow, grinning. "Nice job! You make a great assistant," she put her hands on her hips, admiring their work, "let's take a break." Nyla hadn't realized how sore she was until they sat down on the front steps of the farmhouse. It had been too long since she had done manual labor to this degree. Zuzu City had softened her. Too soft for her liking. Building this barn was exactly what she needed.

"I can't thank you enough for taking a discount on the barn for me," Nyla told Robin, looking over at the red-head. She had went to the carpenter's shop nearly begging Robin to barter something for building a barn. As mildly successful as her first potato harvest had been, she hadn't earned quite enough money to build one. With the promise that Nyla would provide a fair bit of labor herself, Robin agreed to do it for cheap. 

"Ah, don't mention it. I'll just con Lewis into making you my gift giver during the Feast of the Winter Star," Robin joked. She turned towards Nyla then, a curious look on her face, "If you don't mind, why did you want a barn so quickly?" She was only surprised she hadn't been asked that question sooner. 

"I've found I'm not good with plants. This is actually my first time growing anything but I've worked with animals before," she looked over at the skeleton of the barn, imagining it full of goats. Perhaps a cow or a pig but definitely goats. "I'll still try with some crops though," she added, "I just miss the company of animals." Prunello had sadly been absent for the day. Robin nodded, accepting that as a good enough reason.

"You'll have to tell me about your work sometime then, sounds interesting. This barn still has a long way to go though, so let's get to it." Robin stood up, offering a hand to Nyla. She pulled herself up and the women returned to work.

The night was old by the time Nyla curled into her bed. Robin insisted on finishing the barn that day. As she was indebted to her, Nyla had no room to argue. Every piece of her seemed to ache. A deep, radiating pain that blocked her mind of the usual intrusive thoughts that chased away her dreams. It was something she was thankful for as she quickly drifted off to sleep.

What one could assume was only a few hours later, she began turning fitfully in her sleep. Her chest rose and fell in rapid succession. The breaths she was taking were shallow. Sweat soaked into the sheets around her as beads of it rolled down her face. Then all of a sudden she was awake, screaming. Nyla shot from her bed, tumbling to her knees in her panic. Struggling to stand she bolted to the door, a fear so intense igniting a primal response in her. Throwing it open and running through it she never looked back. 

Nyla was damn near Marnie's ranch when she fell to her knees again, this time sobbing. It had been so long since a night terror had shaken her so terribly. She hadn't even realized how far she was running. All she could do was lie there, letting the attack run its course. By the time her tears were dried and the beating in her chest returned to normal, she had sprawled herself out on the grass. When she tried to turn herself over and stand, her limbs screamed in protest. It felt like she had just built five more barns. Whenever this happened it ruined her physically as well as emotionally. _Get up, you're pathetic._ The coarse words beating in her head seemed to assist her. Nyla shakily pulled herself up, brushing off bits of grass from her clothes. Sniffling, she turned to make her way back home when she heard a splash.

Though her eyes had adjusted well to the moonlight, it was still hard to make out the figure standing at the end of the dock. The glow of the lantern near them silhouetted their figure against the darkness. There was another splash. Nyla headed towards the noise, curiosity overriding any other thoughts. Right now anything seemed better than that house. When she was close enough she recognized it was Shane, drinking a beer and kicking rocks into the water. Well, she _had_ wanted to see him for his birthday today. Something about the situation felt private, though, and she didn't want to upset him. She turned to leave, curiosity satiated, when she heard him call out to her. 

"Oh hey, up late, huh?" Maybe it was her intense anxiety to return home but he sounded more inviting than usual. Nyla decided to take a chance and head to the end of the pier to stand next to him. When she stopped, he bent over and pulled a beer from a plastic ring of them. "Here, have a cold one." Nyla took it without a word, puzzled by his actions. Shane had never started a conversation with her, save for the one during the Festival. Hell, he hardly looked at her even when she'd greet him. A pink flush covered his face. _I wonder how long he's been out here?_ She thought to herself.

The hiss from the can sounded like a bomb in the quiet of the night. She stood silently next to him, an open but completely full can in her hands, enjoying the cool air on her skin when he finally spoke up. 

"You ever feel like...no matter what you do, you're gonna fail?" His words caught her off guard. Nyla had always assumed Shane was hurting but never did she think he'd open up to her. She couldn't help but wonder why. "Like you're stuck in some miserable abyss," he continued, "and you're so deep you can't even see the light of day?" Nyla squeezed her can tightly, a lump forming in her throat. She looked up at him but he was staring off into the lake. He shut his eyes, sighing, then turned and met her gaze. "I just feel like no matter how hard I try...I'm not strong enough to climb out of that hole." It was Nyla's turn to look off into the distance, getting lost in her own thoughts.

"Least you're not alone...in that hole I mean," She hardly noticed him watching her as she had watched him. "Everyday feels like the same battle. Sometimes I win. Sometimes I lose," Nyla began to mumble, "Most times I lose." She brought the can to her lips and drained the entire thing. The irony of the night wasn't lost on her. She ran from the same feelings she was running into now. Knowing how Shane felt made her hate that he had those feelings. In her eyes, no one deserved to hurt like that, except maybe herself. But that was a story for another night. 

"Heh...you're always drinking fast. Woman after my own heart." The lump in her throat from earlier returned but for very different reasons. "Just don't make it a habit. You've got a future ahead of you still." Nyla's attention fell to the wood on the pier. Future? Shane had no idea what he was talking about but she didn't have the energy to argue with him. Out of the corner of her eye she saw him swaying where he stood. She couldn't just leave him here, in danger of falling into the lake.

"Come on, we should probably get to bed." She nodded her head towards land. Shane seemed to contemplate if he agreed with her or not. 

"Yeah...you're right. My liver's begging me to stop anyway." They made their way towards Marnie's ranch, Nyla more than once placing her hand on his arm to steady his walking. She even waited as he got sick by the door, groaning about how Marnie would be angry in the morning. Shane mumbled a farewell and Nyla headed home alone in the dark, happy she had finally made a connection with him, albeit a bittersweet one.


	5. Chapter 5

##### Nyla

Nyla wasn't aware air could ever smell this sweet. There must have been hundreds, no, thousands of flowers in the valley. Their petals would break off and flutter gracefully through the wind. The wildlife seemed to blossom as well. Squirrels chased each other through flowers and up trees. Butterflies perched on petals, gently flapping their wings. The walk to Emily's house wasn't very long but it was quite nice this early in the morning. 

Emily had told her yesterday to come by, that she would have a surprise for her. Nyla was curious, to say the least. She hadn't done Emily a favor recently nor was her birthday close. What could it be? Nyla almost didn't notice a certain usual commuter on his way to work. Almost.

"Morning Shane!" She called. Since that night on the dock he was much friendlier to her. Well...friendly wasn't the right word. He mainly stopped glaring at her whenever she spoke to him and generally, her greetings were returned. Shane turned his head when he heard her, glancing down at his watch.

"Why are you here?" He still didn't seem to care how he worded anything he said to her. Nyla just took his words with a gentle understanding. 

"Emily invited me over. Said she had a surprise for me," she shrugged as she spoke, slowing her pace but continuing on her way. He never turned back around but gave her a lazy wave in response. 

"Have fun at your girlfriends." She couldn't help but scoff at him. In the back of her mind, however, she wondered if she needed another friend other than Emily. They did spend a lot of time together. Her mind wandered as she approached Emily's door and knocked. She wanted to talk to Abigail more. She always saw her with Sam and Sebastian. Oh, Sam had always been nice. A bit immature but nice. Nyla gasped as her mind jumped to Jodi and her husband in the army. Did Emily's house always smell like smoke?

"Nyla!" She hadn't even realized Emily answered the door. "Jeez you zone out a lot...are you alright?" 

"I'm fine Em...just...daydreaming," unfortunately it seemed she took too long to respond for Emily's liking. She eyed Nyla worriedly, looking her up and down as if she was going to sprout another head. Emily did eventually move aside to let her friend in, as nervous for her as she was.

"You do look tired...sit down. You could have just told me..." her voice trailed off as she walked into her kitchen.

"Don't worry," Nyla called to her, slumping down into the comfy armchair, "I'm always tired nowadays. Who knew farming was hard?" And the terrors. Those might be more of the problem than her farming but she chose to ignore them. Emily returned with two cups of tea, something Nyla was very thankful for. 

"So I guess I'll get right to the point then," the pep in her voice had returned, "you know tomorrow is the flower dance right?" The tea stuck in Nyla's throat. She honestly had planned to skip that. Knowledge of the holiday hadn't escaped her. Afterall, she saw that damned calendar everytime she went to Pierre's. Nyla hadn't danced since she was a child. How unsure she was of attending must have shown on her face. "It's not that bad! There will be lots of delicious food made by Gus and the little forest spot is beautiful. Plus, you don't _have_ to dance but I thought we could dance together. Ya know, as friends. I just want you to see all the Valley has and-"

"Okay, okay!" Nyla laughed, waving her hand to block Emily's words. As much as she didn't want to go, Emily was just too excited about it to say no. Plus, she could only imagine how some of the other villagers might react if she was the only one to not show. "What's the dress code? I've got a couple nice shirts."

"And that, Nyla, is why I've invited you here!" Emily quickly sat her tea down causing some of it to slosh over the side. Nyla could hear various rummaging as Emily dug around in her room. Finally she appeared with a lovely white dress decorated with delicate lace designs. "It's silly but the eligible men and women of the village wear matching outfits. I was able to find you a dress and I just needed you to try it on. I can pin it and make any adjustments tonight. Here you can change in my room."

Nyla could only breathe again when the door shut behind her. She hardly realized when Emily threw the dress in her hands and whisked her off the chair. What was she thinking? She couldn't wear this. Not a dress. Nyla's hands clenched into fists, the fabric stretching as she brought it to her forehead. As she released her grasp, wrinkles stayed in the material. What could she do? Nyla dropped the dress and pulled off her shirt as a sickness settling in her stomach. She touched the metal button of her jeans. Leaving them on was the only choice she had. Nyla grabbed the dress from the floor, threw it on, and stepped out of the room before she lost all her courage. Or vomited. Whichever came first.

Immediately it was apparent on Emily's face she thought it was odd. Why would someone leave their jeans on under a dress? _You're just a freak, don't forget that._ Intrusive thoughts always seemed to rack her brain in situations like this. Emily's eyes looked her up and down.

"It's going to be a little hard to get the correct measurements with your pants on you know," Emily explained, "but you seem adamant on wearing them. I'll try my best but I've gotta ask...why?" Nyla knew she'd be curious. Emily motioned for her to stand on a little stool as she began to measure and pin the dress to better fit her. 

"I'm just..." The words seemed to burn in her throat. Nyla could feel heat in face but fought through it. "I'm just uncomfortable with my body. I don't...I'm not very attractive." It was the truth. Well, as much truth as Emily needed. Thankfully, that seemed to satiate her.

"What? Are you crazy? Nyla you're super pretty. I love your eyes and really wish I had your cheekbones. Plus your hair is so shiny..." Emily just seemed to flood her with compliments whether she thought they were true or not. It did help but at the same time made her ill with guilt. One day things would be different. They never stayed the same for long, not around her.

After about a half hour Emily was satisfied with her pin job. "Best I can do under the, uh, circumstances but I can make do. Be careful changing," Emily continued to talk through her bedroom door, "Come by around the same time tomorrow morning. You can change here and we can head there together, alright?" Nyla exited her room, gingerly handing Emily the dress.

"Alright. Oh...and don't think I'm not thankful. I truly am I just-"

"I understand Nyla. We've all got our demons. Don't sweat it."

This friendship was going to hurt to lose one day. "Thanks Emily, I'll see you tomorrow."

##### Shane

"Marnie, I am not wearing that." Shane stood like a child, arms crossed and glaring, as Marnie held up a light blue suit. He'd look ridiculous in that thing. Plus he hardly wanted to advertise the fact that no woman was interested in him. This entire day was stupid and pointless. Marnie's face hardened.

"This is a Valley _tradition_ Shane, it's important. I don't care if you're just going to stand around and eat, I just want you to look nice while do it!" She threw the suit into his arms. His Aunt didn't seem like she was going to back down from this at all. If he didn't wear this ugly thing she'd berate him the entire time he was there. Jas was also in the room over, admiring her own holiday dress, so he didn't want to get in a shouting match right now.

"No tie," he said through gritted teeth as he went to his bedroom to change. Shane threw the suit on as fast as he could, wrinkling the white shirt underneath quite a bit. He hastily tucked it into his pants and pulled on the blue suit jacket, not even bothering to button it up. When he came back out he wasn't sure if Marnie regretted her choice to dress him up or not. Thankfully, she didn't way a word about it. 

"Come on Jas, we're heading out," Marnie called, and the little girl scurried into the kitchen wearing a lovely white dress. Jas did a twirl, sending her ruffles bouncing. 

"Isn't my dress pretty Shane?" Whatever magic Jas was made of, he wished he had more of it in his life. He felt himself smiling as he patted her head.

"It's going to be the prettiest dress there," he told her. Jas laughed, doing another twirl before bolting out the door. She was far too excited to wait for either of them. 

By the time him and Marnie arrived, it seemed the rest of the village was there. People had separated into their usual little groups. All of the eligible men and women were in their respective suits and dresses. Everyone aside from Shane seemed to put effort into their appearance today. As fun as it was watching the crowd, he really wanted to disappear behind the delicious table of food. Someone, though, was already trying to do just that.

The farmer was just standing, alone, watching people from the buffet. She was wearing the traditional dress, white with lace designs. Her skin seemed to glow in the sunlight; her black hair done in numerous braids that were then put up in a bun with a chosen few dangling from her shoulders. Never had he seen her in something that nice and, for just a moment, let himself think about how attractive she really was.

"Oh good, you like her," Marnie caught him staring. _Ugh. Shit._ His Aunt was grinning at him. Did she know how goofy she looked? "Oh I'm just kidding, don't be such a grump. Still...she _is_ in a white dress. Just keep that in mind!" As Marnie left him she gave him a little shove toward the table. Which was completely unnecessary. Where else was he going to go anyway?

Nyla didn't even seem to notice him as he approached. Her hands were folded gently over her stomach, eyes locked on the small crowd. Some might have thought she looked peaceful, enjoying the atmosphere. Shane thought she looked anxious. He also saw something peculiar. She seemed to be wearing jeans and sneakers along with her dress. It was so utterly odd and unexpected, he smiled. She decided that was when she would notice him. At first she seemed surprised and he thought he scared her. It was sort of creepy just standing there like an idiot, smiling. But she merely smiled back at him. He felt that smile in his knees.

"I was wondering if you were going to show up," her eyes looked him up and down. He suddenly wished he hadn't been so rough with his clothing earlier. At the same time, however, she wasn't dressed perfectly. "It's not my scene either but my girlfriend just had to come. Women, huh?" Shane relaxed just a bit. Marnie had been right about one thing, she was easy-going. 

"Heh...yeah. Marnie really wanted me here. As long as there's food, I'm happy." As he said that he started to load up a plate with his usual favorites, making sure to not be nearly as messy as he usually was. Nyla's attention would dart from the activities of the people and then back to him. Whenever he met her eyes he remembered that night he shared with her not so long ago. Some of it was a blur but he recalled a bit of it. _Everyday feels like a battle_. Those words resonated with him in a way no one in the valley had before. Everytime he had thought that maybe...just maybe he wanted someone like that in his life, he was sure to remind himself how much he didn't deserve it.

"Aren't you going to ask?" Nyla broke the silence that had crept between them. Shane narrowed his eyes in confusion. She couldn't mean...to dance? There's no way in hell she could mean dance. But what if she did? "I mean about my pants. That's been the first question out of everyone since I got here. Kinda just wanna get it over with." The breath finally left his chest. Shane wasn't sure if he was relieved or disappointed.

"Oh...well, I'm not exactly dressed to impress either. You've got pants, I've got no tie and lots of wrinkles," Shane shrugged. He never cared about his own attire. Why should he judge anyone else's? Nyla gave him another smile, softer this time. 

"Thanks Shane. It's silly but I really appreciate that," Nyla anxiously played with her fingers, "We should talk more...just at the saloon I mean. Well, not _just_ there I just meant it'd be easiest. Since you're al-"

"Yeah. Okay. Anytime," His answer was much quicker and more affirmative than he thought it was going to be. Dammit, he didn't mean to sound enthusiastic about it. She'd probably just change her mind. Nyla didn't even seem to notice. Those green eyes of hers lit up and she nodded. She seemed about to respond but she was hugged from behind by Emily.

"Hey! The dance is starting soon. Do you still want to?" Nyla gave him a sheepish grin as she let Emily whisk her away to the dance area. Shane stayed put, noticing the table felt much lonelier than it usually did during holidays. A mixture of fear, anticipation and guilt was brewing in his stomach. He wasn't exactly sure what game he was getting himself into or if he even wanted to play. But every time his eyes made contact with hers while she danced, that feeling in his stomach grew just a little stronger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So..uh, sorry about that unannounced hiatus. I could list a bunch of excuses, main one being I work nights for a few months. I also get a little discouraged about my writing but I just need to realize this is a fun, stress relieving activity. And I do appreciate all comments and kudos. Not sure how often I'll post but I'm going to try to write a little every night. I read everything and comments are nice. Thanks bunches :) Also, I have no creativity for chapter titles right now. Maybe I'll come back to add one.


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